10 Minutes of Godzilla


Let's face it. As grownups, we don't have a lot of extra time on our hands. And if I've got two hours to spare I'd rather spend it napping than watching a movie that sucks. But, I'm willing to give any movie ten minutes to grab me. 

10 Minutes of Godzilla

I don't have many regrets. But, one my big ones was selling this bad boy in a garage sale.
Yeah, that's the Shogun Warrior edition of Godzilla. It's going for anywhere between one and two grand on Ebay. If you still have the box, that is. Well, I HAD THE DAMN BOX and every piece of the toy which was really just him and a fist that launched for no apparent reason.

Anyway. It was pretty cool and I was a stupid kid. But the point is. This was pretty much my only exposure to Godzilla aside from a coloring book based on the cartoon where he had laser vision since a sonic scream, massive tail and monstrous size simply aren't enough.

Conspiracy in the Yard

As fall approaches Scarydad has begun closing down his garden. While digging around in the flowerbeds he has uncovered something more than he expected. It's not a snake. Don't get squeamish.

The past couple of weeks have been pretty nice here at Castle Scarydad. The kids have been good, nothing of consequence has fallen apart (nothing I couldn’t fix anyway) and most of all, the weather has been astounding. And by astounding, I mean high 80’s and rainy. Yeah, we actually look forward to that here. It’s the little things in life, let me tell you.

So, Houston August came along and burned up whatever was left in the gardens and it was the first of September when we cleaned them out and prepped for our fall plantings. This mostly consisted of adding some compost, fertilizer, and some additional soil before planting some new plants. We also got a couple dozen bags of shredded wood mulch to dress the other beds around the house.  It was while I was standing in line at the garden center that the something occurred to me:

Make Your Friends Jealous

It's time for another giveaway. 

Follow the link to enter to win a signed copy of Tortugas Rising by me. If you win you're friends will be jealous. You'll like that.

Make 'em jealous

Tortugas Rising by Benjamin  Wallace

Tortugas Rising

by Benjamin Wallace

Giveaway ends September 20, 2014.
See the giveaway details at Goodreads.
Enter to win

I've written a story that explores what would happen to our pets in the event humans were wiped off the Earth. It's a comedy. Think Milo & Otis meets The Stand. You'll get the story for free if you're signed up for my newsletter.

Overheard in the Dugout

If this conversation overheard in the dugout at last night’s game doesn't prove that I am father of the year, I don't know what will... 
Kid 1    “I threw my arm out.”

Minion “How?” - Minion 

Kid 1     “With the ball. On that last play.”  

Minion   “That sucks.” - Minion

Kid 1     “Yeah. It really hurts."

Kid 2       “What do we do?”  

Kid 1        “I don’t know.”

Minion    “Let me help.”  

Kid 2        “Be careful.” 
Minion      “Let’s stretch it a little.”  

Kid 1         “Ow.”

Minion       “Sorry.”   

Coach        “Hey, don’t rip his arm off.” 

Minion       “No problem, we’ll just eat it for dinner. Cannibalism. Yay!” 

Coach        “Alex, we need to talk…”

That’s my boy!


In an effort to make the world less dumb, we are now giving away free books. 

Poor Roger Goodell

I've always believed that sports bring out the worst in people. They turn people into arrogant, ranting idiots seemingly programed to react to simple phrases and colors like a puppy in a test lab. Now, before you get all upset, I'm not picking on one type of athlete—I'm talking about the players and the fans.

In the last few weeks we've seen my theory hold true with Ray Rice beating his fiancee/wife, Greg Hardy for domestic violence and Adrian Peterson being indicted for injuring a child. With all of this going on I can't help but think, "poor Roger Goodell." I feel sorry for him.

The Hunt for Whiskey Beans, Pt 1

The Grind
It’s difficult to imagine a time in history before the cultivation of the mighty coffee bean. It was most likely bleak and everyone was cranky. Thankfully, we live in a civilized time where our biggest problem is choosing our favorite bean and brew that gets us through our day. Doing this through bleary eyes is a challenge but Jason is up to it.
 So a few weeks back the Head DWH In Charge brought this little video to my attention:

Garland-based Lakewood Brewery collaborated with Noble Coyote Roasters to answer one of life’s greatest mysteries: what would happen if someone took young, green coffee beans and aged them for four months in bourbon barrels used to make milk stout?