Blog » Page 26 of 27 » DUMB WHITE HUSBAND


I can never seem to find anything and I am told by my bride that she did not move anything. She then proceeds to find it. –  @ill_annoyed   This isn’t technically a question but I see what you’re getting at. There are few things more frustrating than knowing where something is and then that […] Read more

Sample from The Dumb White Husband’s Guide to Babies

Here’s a sample from my new release The Dumb White Husband’s Guide to Babies. There’s going to be some downtime both before and after the kid gets there. Here are some things you cannot do to entertain yourself: • Wheelchair races. • Standing at the nursery window and asking doting new dads why their babies […] Read more

NEW RELEASE – The Dumb White Husband’s Guide to Babies

In the course of being a husband there’s a good chance your going to get your wife all pregnant. When that happens, you’ll want to be prepared. There are a few books out there that will tell you what’s going on with your growing baby and your wife. But, they never seem too concerned with […] Read more


Why don’t guys understand the brilliance of Jane Austen books or movies based upon them? – SC Perkins That’s a great question. One that I don’t think I’m really qualified to answer since I’ve never read one of Jane’s books or seen any of her movies. At first I thought I had and I was […] Read more

DUMB WHITE HUSBAND Product Review: Sonos

–> Remember your first remote control car? You were probably about three feet tall and it had a foot a half long black wire stuck to the back forcing you to hunch over and scurry behind it having no fun whatsoever and realizing that there was absolutely nothing remote about it. Remember seeing your friend’s […] Read more

Running & Writing

GUEST POST by Dusty Craine My life outside of family and work is consumed with two things right now: Running and Writing. One I love and the other I loathe. One is good for the body and the other is good for the soul. Or maybe they’re both good for both. I don’t know. Who […] Read more

Braxton Hicks: Bastard

From the upcoming book Dumb White Husband vs Babies: A Guide for the Unsuspecting Father BRAXTON HICKS     Braxton Hicks was probably a bastard. I hate research so I haven’t really looked into it but the contractions named after him are the false alarm of pregnancy. They send you into a panic and offer no […] Read more

NEW RELEASE – Dumb White Husband vs. The Tooth Fairy

I’m not a good tooth fairy. I’m a decent Easter Bunny and a great Santa, but I’m a lousy tooth fairy. Maybe it’s the randomness of it all. Christmas has a date. Easter has a very confusing date (really, can’t we nail this down), but a date nonetheless. I could be called upon to be […] Read more

The Zen of Avoidance

GUEST POST by Steven Luna I stopped what I was doing recently to ponder how the Art of Doing Nothing has become sorely under-appreciated in the modern era. In our dream-driven, achievement-oriented lives, we aren’t content to be in one form of motion at a time. Latched firmly onto the teat of the Holy Internet […] Read more

Ask a DUMB WHITE HUSBAND – Guys Flicks vs Rom Coms

Why do DWH prefer movies with fights, chases, and things blowing up, over sensitive dramas or rom coms? Is it part of our primal nature to want action and danger, even though we’re sitting on the couch with a cold one? Are we afraid of, or simply uncomfortable with, stories about relationships? (A wife asking […] Read more

Dumb White Husband vs. Fatherhood

From the upcoming Dumb White Husband vs Fatherhood: A Guide We already established that we don’t know jack about going into this baby thing. Honestly, did you know that cats were fur-bearing murder machines made of an evil so foul that even their shit carried fetus-killing poison? Of course not. We assumed, but we never […] Read more


Dumb Husbands unite. There is safety in numbers and it’s time to show the world what we really know. Do you have some knowledge, an opinion or a plan you’d like to share with the world? Well this is the place.  We need contributors to help spread the message of the dumb husband. We’re looking […] Read more


Why must I always remind my husband to take out the trash? I mean, why can’t he figure this out for himself? – J. I can honestly say that I often forget to take out the trash. I too must be reminded. I’m not sure what it is. It’s early, that’s for sure. My mind […] Read more


Can we address the Dumb White Husband vs. the love poem? Like why is it so difficult to receive an original one? – Kim When you say original, you mean something new; something that’s never been said to someone like you. It’s simply not fair to expect us to write like Byron or Frost or […] Read more


In honor of the Memorial Day weekend, you can download the bestselling short story Dumb White Husband vs. The Grocery Store for FREE at Amazon. It’s about a Dumb White Husband that goes to the Grocery Store. FREE ON AMAZON


How can I get my husband to pay more attention to me than his Apple gadgets? – Sarah A:  iBoobs.I wouldn’t even begin to peek into the mind of Steve Jobs. But, if you guys want to speculate as to what the features of this revolutionary product may be, be my guest and leave them […] Read more


I cringe when my wife says on a Saturday morning, “Look darling, it’s a beautiful day outside.” We all know what that means. How do I escape the inevitable? – Woelf It’s never a simple observation, you’re right. A commentary on a nice day means that it will soon be ruined for you. Nature, while […] Read more

Ask a DUMB WHITE HUSBAND – Mother’s Day Present

Do I need to buy my wife a Mother’s Day present… even though she’s not my mother? – Steve A good question Steve. Since becoming a father myself I’ve long struggled with this question. The answer is, of course, no. She’s not your mother therefore you should not get her a gift. The gifts should […] Read more


An excerpt from the upcoming book Dumb White Husband vs. Fatherhood (A Guide) Annoying tags. Threads on clothes. Those wires that hold toys into their packages. Fighting off bears. Turning water bottles into sippy cups. Making good on threats to pop that damn balloon. Cutting things. Nothing ridiculous. I’m not talking about strapping a machete […] Read more


Why does my husband cringe when I say, “I have an idea?” – Julie Julie, men love ideas. Take Isaac Newton for example. The guy was full of ideas and chased them all with a passion. He got the idea that it was more than change in our pockets that was holding us onto the […] Read more